A Single Word Can Muck Up Your Relationship: a need for awareness and honesty

When coaching with couples, we usually ask if they know their partner’s hot buttons – words, a look, an expression that sends the partner into defensiveness, anger, withholding, or running. The answer is always “yes.” A really simple way to improve your relationship is to stop pushing those buttons.  Easier said than done.  As well… Continue Reading

Job Jar: A simple family tool for empowerment, collaboration, pride, and fun

When coaching with couples (especially those with young children), we often hear concerns about household tasks that don’t get done, or resentment about which person needs to do them. The resentments are often due to unmet and uncommunicated expectations about “the way it should be.” Yet, at the core, these parents usually share a common… Continue Reading

The Rotary Four-Way Test: It Affects Your Marriage And All Relationships

Recently we were visiting with Connie and Bernie. This couple have done the conscious and consistent work to transform their relationship whereby they now strive to work together to bring out each other’s wonderfulness. They gave us a small medallion which they use to remind themselves to keep working together for the betterment of themselves,… Continue Reading

2 X 2 Couple’s Retreat: 10 Reasons to do it

Where we live out in the “sticks,” most of us have a 4 X 4 truck.  For us, it’s a no-brainer – for stability, safety, flexibility, and power. Our 4 X 4 keeps us solidly on the road, regardless of the conditions.  When consciously attending to conditions, we travel safely and get where we’re going. … Continue Reading

1 Choice That Changes Everything In Your Marriage

Marriage (or any long-term intimate relationship) can be the most satisfying, gratifying, and mystifying experience in life.  Maybe that’s why a large percentage of our population try it. It seems that many people “try it,” as a sport that you win or lose, and naturally the intent is to win. Other people “totally commit to… Continue Reading