Category Archives: Personal Growth

Drama Addiction: Is it a resource-sucker for you?

I’ve not seen any research about the social and economic impacts of drama-addiction.  Have you?  Like any addiction, there is a huge cost. Maybe there is no qualitative or quantitative research because most of us are so immersed in our dramas, we don’t even recognize it’s a problem. I invite you to step back from… Continue Reading

Is Your Relationship Losing The Device War?

Walking in West Edmonton Mall recently, we were more acutely aware of the device war that seems to be escalating in our society. This device war is destroying intimate relationships, families, communities, businesses, and maybe the world (based on what we see and hear about our political leaders).  A new-age world war, maybe?  What do… Continue Reading

Forgiveness: The only real job you and I have

Forgiveness is art and a science.  Art because it takes creativity.  Science because if stimulates physiological and neurological healing and change. That aside, I believe in my deepest core that forgiveness is the most important and meaningful task you and I have in our lives.  Why? Forgive is for-giving love I’m not a religious guy. … Continue Reading

Curiosity: One Skill That Will Save Your Marriage

You may be thinking, “How can curiosity save a marriage?” BINGO.  Just that one question can kick the pre-frontal cortex of your brain into gear to find better answers and solutions to any challenge you may face in your relationship. The challenge is that most of us have not been trained to ask good questions. … Continue Reading

Chronic Complaints: After 3 times, lay that sucker out

You might know the routine.  Out of genuine care and concern for your partner you ask, “How was your day?” The response goes something like this, “Oh, you can’t believe what a crappy day it was……… (on and on and on, gag, gag, adnosium).” Too often, replaying these stories, and telling them over and over only… Continue Reading

What You Were Told As A Kid Doesn’t Work: The Art & Science of Word Use

Remember the ditty, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me”? Totally ridiculous, wasn’t it? The phrase would supposedly protect us from verbal attacks on the playground at school. If you think about the flip-side of the phrase, it means it’s OK for the bully to use verbal attacks. After… Continue Reading

Just Because I Don’t Know The Plan, Doesn’t Mean There Isn’t One

I just finished re-reading ‘The Power of TED’ by David Emerald and am pondering where I consistently jump into the Dreaded Drama Triangle. If you’re not familiar with the Drama Triangle, I invite you to get the book and read it. The Triangle consists of 3 positions we play in our self-created dramas: Victim, Persecutor,… Continue Reading

Job Jar: A simple family tool for empowerment, collaboration, pride, and fun

When coaching with couples (especially those with young children), we often hear concerns about household tasks that don’t get done, or resentment about which person needs to do them. The resentments are often due to unmet and uncommunicated expectations about “the way it should be.” Yet, at the core, these parents usually share a common… Continue Reading

Love That You Can’t Buy, Thank God For Kids

The Oak Ridge Boys.  Remember them? An amazing country-gospel group of guys that continue to make fabulous music.  You might remember, “Elvira – oom-pappa-oom-pappa-oom-pappa-mow-mow” At this time of year, I find myself singing their song, “Thank God For Kids.” For some reason, the words send shivers up my spine and tears flow.  I think it’s… Continue Reading