I’ve not seen any research about the social and economic impacts of drama-addiction. Have you? Like any addiction, there is a huge cost. Maybe there is no qualitative or quantitative research because most of us are so immersed in our dramas, we don’t even recognize it’s a problem. I invite you to step back from… Continue Reading
Walking in West Edmonton Mall recently, we were more acutely aware of the device war that seems to be escalating in our society. This device war is destroying intimate relationships, families, communities, businesses, and maybe the world (based on what we see and hear about our political leaders). A new-age world war, maybe? What do… Continue Reading
Forgiveness is art and a science. Art because it takes creativity. Science because if stimulates physiological and neurological healing and change. That aside, I believe in my deepest core that forgiveness is the most important and meaningful task you and I have in our lives. Why? Forgive is for-giving love I’m not a religious guy. … Continue Reading
You may be thinking, “How can curiosity save a marriage?” BINGO. Just that one question can kick the pre-frontal cortex of your brain into gear to find better answers and solutions to any challenge you may face in your relationship. The challenge is that most of us have not been trained to ask good questions. … Continue Reading
You might know the routine. Out of genuine care and concern for your partner you ask, “How was your day?” The response goes something like this, “Oh, you can’t believe what a crappy day it was……… (on and on and on, gag, gag, adnosium).” Too often, replaying these stories, and telling them over and over only… Continue Reading
Remember the ditty, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me”? Totally ridiculous, wasn’t it? The phrase would supposedly protect us from verbal attacks on the playground at school. If you think about the flip-side of the phrase, it means it’s OK for the bully to use verbal attacks. After… Continue Reading
I just finished re-reading ‘The Power of TED’ by David Emerald and am pondering where I consistently jump into the Dreaded Drama Triangle. If you’re not familiar with the Drama Triangle, I invite you to get the book and read it. The Triangle consists of 3 positions we play in our self-created dramas: Victim, Persecutor,… Continue Reading
When coaching with couples (especially those with young children), we often hear concerns about household tasks that don’t get done, or resentment about which person needs to do them. The resentments are often due to unmet and uncommunicated expectations about “the way it should be.” Yet, at the core, these parents usually share a common… Continue Reading
I have a bundle of habits that rule my life. So do you. If you think about your brain as a computer, this bundle of habits is an amazing operating system that makes much of life easy. It operates in the background and does calculations and tasks so you can focus your attention on activities… Continue Reading
The Oak Ridge Boys. Remember them? An amazing country-gospel group of guys that continue to make fabulous music. You might remember, “Elvira – oom-pappa-oom-pappa-oom-pappa-mow-mow” At this time of year, I find myself singing their song, “Thank God For Kids.” For some reason, the words send shivers up my spine and tears flow. I think it’s… Continue Reading