At Thinkin Outside The Barn, couples connect with us when seeking marriage counselling in Alberta. Some of them are in marriage crisis and others are in a good spot, yet wanting to bring their marriage to a higher level of satisfaction. If you are in either one of those places, or somewhere in between, this might be just what you’re looking for.
Almost 50% of all marriages end in divorce. Not a pleasant statistic. Yes, there are times when divorce is the only viable solution, but most couples can avoid that choice by seeking outside help before it’s too late.
Every marriage will experience difficulties:
- communication challenges
- can’t trust each other
- stuck in power struggle
- lack of a shared vision
- can’t agree about finances
Having the tools and skills to effectively deal with challenges will determine where your marriage fits in the statistics.
Married for over 35 years ourselves, and through working with hundreds of couples over the past 18 years, we have experienced, or seen most of the challenges couples encounter. We’ve either been in your boots, or know what they smell like.
What Is Marriage Counselling?
Albert Einstein said, ‘The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.’
Marriage counselling provides new, safe levels of thinking, speaking, and behaving. In its simplest form, it supports both people to make small incremental habit changes over time. Yes, that says ‘both people.’
Sometimes, there is a cut and dried answer you need to hear, or a tool you need to learn. Sometimes, alternatives you’ve not thought of need to be explored and decisions made. Sometimes, there are complex life issues, deeply seated in values and past experiences, that need to be physically, emotionally, and mentally understood for you to make confident steps forward.
Marriage counselling helps you zoom out to see your challenges from a different vantage point. You discover and evaluate new possibilities, as well as reflect and celebrate what you initially loved about your spouse. Measurable outcomes are determined, which ensures you hold yourselves accountable to long-term success strategies.
Does My Marriage Need Help From A Marriage Counsellor?
Some indicators are:
- You continue to have the same arguments. Only the time and place change.
- You feel that your partner doesn’t listen to you or understand you.
- You put everything and everyone else ahead of your relationship.
- You can’t envision your future together.
- You are only staying together because of your business or your kids.
- You love each other and know you deserve more out of your marriage.
- Your score on the Free Relationship Self-check is less than 90.
If you experience any of the above, or have a niggling feelings that your marriage is off-track, then it’s time to seek help. It is not a sign of weakness; rather it indicates extreme strength, and an understanding that relationships are complex and hard to grow effectively on your own.
It may seem difficult, and you may be fearful about talking to your spouse about marriage counselling. There is a good chance your spouse knows something is awry and is also hesitant to bringing up the conversation.
You or your spouse may think another child, or a new house, or a vacation, or a boat or sled will fix it. These band-aids may mask the issue for awhile, but the deeper issues won’t heal on their own.
Unfortunately, some couples wait until they feel it is hopeless. It can be very difficult to heal from this, yet it is possible.
How Can Thinkin Outside The Barn Help My Marriage
Your marriage is likely the most important asset you will ever have. Like your house or car, isn’t it worth some preventative maintenance so it can provide you with the greatest long-term return, value, and satisfaction?
We know your value, and we believe in you. Our vision is to heal our planet, one relationship at a time. To do that, we’ve amassed the tools, techniques, and strategies to help you create your relationship by your design, rather than having it come together, and maybe fall apart, by default. We’ve got formal training in a variety of modalities, plus tried and true ‘School of Hard Knocks’ experience.
One of the unique advantages is that we work with you as a couple – 2 on 2. All our clients have appreciated this approach, rather than sitting in a room with one counsellor.
The first step is an honest conversation with your partner, and with us.
OK, you may not be ready to talk to us – yet. We invite you, or preferably both of you, to complete the no-fee Relationship Self-Check and review your results.
Are you ready to get started? It all starts with conversation. We invite you to call us at 780-785-9479.
We’re happy to offer you a no-fee phone call with all 4 of us on the line (you, your spouse, and the two of us). In the call, we’ll get to know each other. It is critical that you feel comfortable to work with us. We’ll help you determine what measurable relief would look like, sound like, or feel like in your relationship. You’ll learn more about our process and the programs we offer. After the call, it will be up to you both to have a conversation and make a collective decision. This step on its own, is a major accomplishment for some couples.